On January 8, 2021, Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey banned President Donald J. Trump for life. The opportunity for virtue signaling proved irresistible to Dorsey. After the debacle in the Capitol on January 6, Dorsey did what he had been wanting to do for years: cleansed his platform of dissent. Democracy means that the Democrats say what is what. Dorsey made sure that there would be no questioning, by the people, of the “people’s will.” Trump voters are deplorable, after all, and therefore ought to have no say in how their country is run. Dorsey relished banishing their leader into outer darkness, which won Dorsey almost infinite merit in the dharma scheme of the woke Left.

Facebook cracked down, too. Apple quickly followed, and soon Amazon kicked Twitter alternative Parler off its servers. Better get on board with the leftist groupthink, or else be cast out from the lucrative ranks of woke capitalism. If you are not on board with the Marxist reconfiguring of the United States of America, you are anathema. A lume spento. You are out the door—no, you don’t even exist. You have virtually disappeared; all that remains to mark where you once stood is your ghosted Twitter profile, with the terms of your excommunication stamped across its darkened background.

The Twitter Rapture is upon us. It has been a long time coming, but it is finally here. Those who are not destined to be shackled in the “portal coil” of 280 characters have been snatched out of the midst of their peers mid-tweet. Just like that, in an instant, by the thousands and tens of thousands, they are gone.

Praise the Lord

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